Give EXACTLY what he asked for

Gather the most recent statement for each bill that clearly shows the due dates, the amount due etc. Print out your zero dollar budget, gather up recent grocery receipts, and then ask him to really LOOK everything over and then ask you any questions he might have. Don’t get defensive, don’t get accusatory be calm and matter of fact. Tell him THANK YOU for showing an interest in OUR financial situation. Then ask him for his input on how he thinks the budget should be changed. After all he lives there too and he helped create the bills, therefore he should have a say in how they are handled, including giving up the “I wants” for the “must pays”.
Go to a cash envelope system only for: groceries, fuel and blow money for each of you. Explain that $140 is all you have for 2 weeks for ALL the groceries including his juicing vegetables and fruits and that if he can figure out a way to put bread and milk in the house as well as the fruit and vegetables you would be more than glad to let him take over the grocery shopping. Tell him you will make a list of only the foods truly needed for the two weeks, give him the coupons etc and the decision on all the groceries will be his. Suggest he help you plan the menus for the next two weeks so that maybe the two of you together can find the money for his fruits and juices.
In other words, INCLUDE him in the decision making process. Turn some of the responsibility over to him. My dh and ds do 99.99% of my grocery shopping now we have found it saves a lot of “discussion” about what there is and isn’t to eat in the house. I make up the menus, give the list and they KNOW what the budget amount is. Truthfully they do better at staying on the grocery budget than I do.And about that $17 did you include any bank fees or automatic drafts? Letting your account get that low is asking for Mary to sneak in the back door and nail you!

Today is payday

It’s also the check where we pay our rent, which takes the vast majority of it, so these checks are normally tight anyway. Combined with some unexpected things that had to be paid “right now”, we will have $17 left in the bank for 2 weeks, and that’s IF I don’t spend more than $140 in groceries for the next two weeks. Which I might actually be able to do, given the stuff we have in the freezer, food storage etc.Here’s my problem. Financially, DH is a big baby. He REALLY does not like being told NO. Earlier this week he started juicing, the vegetables and fruit for which were outside our grocery budget, but I had the money so it wasn’t a big deal. Given how precarious our situation is, I sent him an email letting him know things were tight, and we would have to suspend NetFlix and Hulu for two weeks, and probably cut back on juicing.
I won’t bore you with details, but the short version is he’s blowing a gasket. Now he wants to have “a meeting” and for me to bring all the credit card statements, cards, bills, etc., so he can know where the money is going (he deserves his entertainment, juicing etc.)Which, if I wasn’t getting the vibe that this is because he is throwing a temper tantrum I would be happy to do….it’s not like I’m spending money on trips to the Riviera or something. So my question is, what is the best way to respond to behavior like this? I know the issue isn’t the present issue per se, so save the ink telling me that. I also know I can’t change “him.” I’m looking for ways for me to take the emotion out of any “meeting,” since usually I just get mad and walk off when he gets like this.