Would I rather that money be put toward getting out of debt?

He used to have $100 a month, but then we ran into a financial wall and he had to give it up (although in his mind, he’s still entitled to it). He does some occasional computing work for someone, and he gets to keep all the money from that (some months it can be substantial) unless we are in dire circumstances. He used that money to buy a “latest and greatest” computer a few months ago. And an iPad. Sure I would. But this is money I wouldn’t normally see anyway (he straight cashes the checks at the guy’s bank, or the guy pays him cash), so IMO, this isn’t worth the battle, and it kind of “pays him back” for the money he spent on my kid the first few years.DH probably doesn’t think anything like that last part of the sentence, but I am keenly aware that part of our financial situation, or more accurately, the reason we are not as far ahead as we ought to be, is a direct result of the baggage I brought into our marriage.I was spending $800 a month on armed, police escorted protection for my oldest when she went to her bio-dad’s. (yes, we live California, where up until OJ, we cared more about “reconciliation” than the safety of the child.) That went on for the first 5 years of our marriage. I am more-than-you-can-imagine grateful that he was willing to pony up the money after I stopped working. I don’t know what I would have done if he hadn’t been….Like I said, he is WAY better than he used to be. And truthfully, I’m not much better. I’m willing to cut our grocery bill to the bone (which impacts him) if the kids need something, or (before DR) put something on a credit card (like food storage) if it was the deal of the century. So we all have our issues.The important thing is we have a program and are working it….even if we derail occasionally.

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